hais smth heartwarmin happen todae

so touched till i can cry

i oso feel hurt till i feel like fallin


todae my grandma wan to go my uncle hse

so i agree and went along wif her

since she is old n feeble

ya hais thn i went i see my cousin

magazine so i look thru

but i put back in e same old place lo

thn my ah ma take thn put diff places


thn aft 9plus she call mi

ssae y i touch her mags i sae i did

but i put back e org. place le

thn she keep sae her mother saw mi takin

thn sae i haf no rite to touch her things

my heart shattered.

oredi beri unhappie dis past few days

thn i told her mayb ah ma take thn put at e coffee table

thn she juz hang up

i tink she paiseh or wat

SO WRONGLY ACCUSED


y always i do thing people wil wan to scold mi

hais

thn our touchin moment is

my father sae she KNS

eat shit so funnie my father

cuz my cousin not bad. ask her father[aka my uncle] go out n move


beri bad rrite? haisss


thn a knock of my hse

i was shock whether she come over n scold mi?

thn is my thrid aunt

thn my father sae she dare to come.

i scold her wow BRAVO FATHER

he is so cool man

cuz he noe i not in fault

hais so touchin

haisss

but i still sad of e person hu write in my tagboard

i dunno is hu

but i m realli a failure?

tok w/o tinkin? perhaps i m lo

hais i sux

forgif? somehow hurt make mi so hard

to forget n forgif

he always sae mi scold mi fUCK wth wtf.

but i dun scold him all dis

if u will mi?

wat will u feel?

happie?


but wen my fault u ANNOUNCE for everyone to noe my weakness

y can't u reflect on ur own speech


if ur good fren always scold u dis

i always learn to accpet as a joke

but it somehow hurts





Lonely Wall

I see the stars each night
-I know I will be great;
I feel people's Pain and Passion
.But why can't I help me?

I'm around people -
My mind is blurred as the surface of the ocean;
I talk, but I'm gone
With the winds with no direction.
But why can't I help me?

There isn't love or trustI can willingly give back -
I've been offered gold and diamonds;
But I seem very unhappy.
Why can't I help me?

Life could be crude -
Life could be adventurous;
Life could mean "live",
But why can't I help myself?

I am shelter when others feel pain -
I am comforting when approached;
I am loved by the world.
Why can't I love myself?
Why can't I feel other people's joy?

Some might call me selfish -
Some might call me stupid;
But if only they could feel my pain,
But if only they understood.
I never wished to be sad -
No one would.

But that is what I'm going through -
I know things would get better;
I would feel like a baby again,
I would watch the sunrise
With someone I might fall in love.
But till then,
Why can't I help myself?